Archive for July 26th, 2009

wakin-dreamI’ve just spent a good portion of my morning cackling madly at my monitor, and I have this site to thank. The site opens with:

A Step-by-Step Guide to joining the Forces of Darkness

and has a handy list of objectives, how-tos, careers and even fashion ideas for the evil-impaired. I recommend it as a comprehensive guide to anyone wishing to begin at the very basics ( What is Evil? Benefits? Etc..), but longtime practitioners need look no further to find something satisfying to their diabolic selves, either. I, for instance, have formulated a whole new Evil Plan with the help of this extensive planner.

The finished goods ( My Plan, to all you beginners):

Congratulations on being the creator of a new

Evil Plan ™!

Your objective is simple: Destroy the Earth.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: To show them all.

Stage One

To begin your plan, you must first traumatize a news reporter. This will cause the world to sign up for life insurance policies, unsettled by your arrival. Who is this demented madman? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in classic black?

Stage Two

Next, you must vaporize the internet. This will all be done from a ‘hell’, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will wet their pants, as countless hordes of mean English teachers hasten to do your every bidding.

Stage Three

Finally, you must unleash your secret death ray, bringing about pain, suffering, the usual. Your name shall become synonymous with the spice girls, and no man will ever again dare make you clean your room. Everyone will bow before your mind-boggling insanity, and the world will have no choice but to elect you dictator for life.

I’m thinking, “I could live with that.”.  XD. Oops, I mean Ha Ha Ha… He-he-he-he-he..Muahahahaha…Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!


*** The End***

P.S. : I wonder who will land up on this page.. ( I also suggest you take a look at the tags for laugh.).

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